As a shy child reaches 9 or 10 years of age, peers tend to start thinking of the child as not normal. The unfortunate effects of being shy include nervousness, decreased development of close relationships, interference with learning, and reduced opportunities to practice and improve social skills. Shy children speak normally at home, so if the parents, when asked, say that the child does not speak clearly at home, the problem is more likely speech delay than shyness. Consider this possibility if the child tries to speak and joins the other children in activities and volunteers and lines up as fast as the others. Shy children usually look and act happy and confident at home. Consider this possibility if the parents, when asked, say that the child usually acts or looks depressed or distressed at home. In general, shy children act normal other than when they are in specific social situations. Consider this possibility if the child shows bizarre behavior such as hand flapping or repeating some other movement again and again, has frequent tantrums, or often makes unintelligible sounds. A teacher calling, “Lisa, stop!” behind Lisa while Lisa is walking will bring a behavioral response in a shy child but not a deaf one. Consider this possibility if the child does not respond in any way to loud noises or someone calling her name behind her. The four problems that might look like shyness are:
In close cases, a expert’s opinion might be useful. There are four possibilities, each much less likely than true shyness. Volunteer last and line up last for activities.Watch but don’t join other children in fun activities.Follow directions but don’t respond verbally to them.Shy children tend to show at least 3 or 4 of the following behaviors in preschool or primary school. What are the signs of shyness in a young student? Teachers never see the children at home smiling, laughing, and chatting away with family members.
Shy children may look tense or distracted in school as they worry about becoming the center of attention or doing something embarrassing. These children may hover near other children day after day but never join the others in play. Or they may say little, speak very softly, and avoid eye contact. Some children, however, warm up much more slowly than others.Ĭhildren who are shy may not respond when spoken to by a teacher or classmate even after weeks of school.
With time, most children start to feel comfortable in a new situation or with a person they’ve recently met and, therefore, act more outgoing, relaxed, and spontaneous. Quite sensibly most children take time to figure out what to do (and not do!) when presented with a novel situation. What’s going on? Well, Beth may be shy.Īlmost all children act shy at times, especially when encountering a new person or situation. Her teacher has been hoping that Beth would warm up and interact more with the other members of the class, but weeks have passed and her behaviour hasn’t changed. Whenever someone speaks to Beth at preschool, she quickly looks down, turns away, and doesn’t say anything.
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